Common Sense for Life Experience
By Rick Piercy/Special
To the Daily Press
As an educational research center, the Lewis Center evaluates
what
works
in the classroom and why. We discovered that many child development questions
are
answered
by common sense.
There are still important and critical issues the center will be studying,
but the center has concluded that what makes your child’s life experience
more fruitful and fulfilling mostly takes common sense and discipline.
Here are some common sense truths:
Children need to have clear and concise boundaries and rules- Children
need to experience consequences if they break the rules, and that the rules
and consequences will be consistently and fairly applied. Home is where children
make mistakes and hopefully suffer consequences and learn from their errors
so that when they are out in the real world they can be successful with a
minimum of serious blunders.
Children must have good role models- Children learn behavior
by imitating others, most often the adults with which they interact. The saying, “Do as I say, not as I do,” is
impossible for a child to follow or comprehend. If a child is told that lying
is wrong and then observes a parent lying he believes the actions of the person
rather than their words.
As a principal, I was always amazed when talking to a parent about their child’s inappropriate language. Many times, the parents conversation is filled with expletives and usually ended with them saying, “I don’t know where he hears it.” Like it or not, children tend to mirror their parent’s
behavior.
Children need to make mistakes- As a parent, we want to shield
our children from mistakes, and it’s our job to protect them. It is also important for us to allow them to take certain risks. Children are going to have conflicts and they need to know how to respond appropriately. They will want to try things that are hard and sometimes they are going to fail. That’s
OK. We all have to learn to deal with imperfections. Sometimes that imperfection
is with our child, so remember that at times your child is going to be at fault.
Remember who is the adult and who is the child- A parent’s
role is not that of pal, buddy, or best friend, only to be the parent, which
is not an easy job. Discipline and guidance needs to take place early. Starting
heavy discipline when they are teenagers requires more work and usually has little
success. The following seems to be true most of the time. Children, who are raised
in a loving and nurturing home, learn to be kind and caring. Children who witness
strong work ethic, tend to know the importance of work. Children who are raised
with fair and consistent discipline understand boundaries and tend to have more
self-confidence.
Lastly, children who are raised by people of character learn honesty, integrity
and gain the courage to do what’s right even when others are not, which
may be the most important life lesson of all.
Rick Piercy, President and CEO of the Lewis Center, has been in education for
24 years.
Used with permission by Daily Press, Freedom Communication, 2003